i consider desperate moves

dodges, breakaways, headfirst headlong dives into air

that smells of peaches and crawling mosses

my hand disappears into rock soft as sunlight

trapped, my head bobs on the surface of deniable waves

i turn, breathe, and surrender

to the terrible wonderful finality

of drinking down the day

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in your silences

you’re the reason i am where i am now
and where i am is nowhere near
you and your antics, your mistrials
your misfires or your silences

and where you were
was never where i’d been
we’d only sidestep,
dance, pretend

i’m the reason you are where you are now
and where i am is nowhere near
you and your songs, your rare smiles
your breath, your words, your promises

and where i was
was never where you’d been
we’d bash our hearts
together, then

you’d be the reason i am where i am now
and where i am is not quite clear
to you, or me, and all the while
i’m listening to your silences

i’m listening to your silences
i’m listening to your silences
i hear you in your silences
i’m with you in your silences

the henchman

i dare not speak of you.
if i give you a name, if i shout your statistics
(or even whisper them, sotto voce)
you will know me for what i am:
a terrified, thrill-seeking mishmash
of bystander, armchair quarterback, and henchman
praying for more time
so i can watch the axe fall in slow motion.